Turning 50

My Experience

I found turning 50 challenging. On one hand I was thrilled to have had the opportunity to be on the earth that long and to have had as many positive experiences as I have, knowing well that not everyone gets that. At the same time it was the first time I thought my age sounded 'old'. I didn't feel old and don't think of myself as old - but things were different.

I'm 52 as I write this post and the last couple of years have been daunting. I completed successful cancer treatment last year which is wonderful news, and it was the hardest thing I've even gone through. I've changed and I'm still working through what that means, but I know my sense of urgency about making the most of my second chapter only accelerated.

I am very happy to be alive, full of optimism about what I hope will be at least a couple more decades of great adventures, but I'm also scared. What if I don't get on top of my fitness, or don't get that long?

Although none of us have any guarantees about what each day will bring, after having had a cancer diagnosis & treatment, I feel more vulnerable than I did before. My mortality feels more real & I feel more scared about maybe not having all the future time I'd hoped I would.

I have spent the majority of my life working hard and being fairly serious, and I hope to be able to change the balance. I want to embrace more me time, and make more time for fun and creativity, particularly more time to travel and explore, and spending more time in nature - as these bring me joy.

Letting Go of Regrets and Looking Forward

After 5 decades we’ve had a lot of life experiences - some wonderful, some painful, and some that leave us with regrets. We may wish we had pursued certain dreams, spent more time with loved ones, or made different choices in relationships or careers. But I believe dwelling on what might have been only holds us back.

Instead, we can embrace turning 50 as a time to practice self-compassion and as time to reset. Every experience, whether joyful or challenging, has contributed to the person we are today. Rather than focusing on past mistakes, we can shift our perspective to focus on what we've learnt and how we can use that wisdom to create a fulfilling future.

I believe the saying that in life, we are most likely to regret the things we didn't do (that we wanted to).

Facing Fears with Courage

Aging can bring certain fears - concerns about health, mortality, physical changes, and around how society perceives older women and the opportunities that may be open for us. We may wonder if our best years are behind us, whether we will be well enough to do all the things we hope to, or whether we will still be valued the way we'd like to be in our professional and personal lives. None if this is helped by the constant media messages associating youth and specific body shapes, with beauty and worth. Although It isn't always easy - we can choose not to be ruled by those fears, we can acknowledge them and choose to not let them hold us back.

We get one life to be who we are now and only the one body to do it in. To get to 50 our bodies have done a lot of amazing work and sometimes it's easy to only see our perceived flaws. Instead, we can define what beauty and success mean to us, and make that a reality in our lives - expecting that the best is yet to come as we focus on our hopes for the future.

Cultivating Gratitude and Celebrating Life

Gratitude can help shift our mindset from scarcity to abundance. It can remind us of the positive things in our lives that we care about - the friendships and family connections we’ve nurtured, the wisdom we’ve gained, and the experiences that have enriched our lives. By taking time to acknowledge these, we can enhance our sense of contentment, and strengthen our expectation that the future holds more good surprises for us.

It is also important that we make time to notice and celebrate our achievements, big and small - whether they related to career, family, overcoming hardships, or becoming a stronger version of ourselves, we have much to be proud of. As we reflect with compassion on our journey to date, we can see how much we've grown along the way.

Making the Most of Our Second Chapter

We can choose to see turning 50 as the start of a new chapter filled with new opportunities - where we can spend more time focused on our personal dreams and passions.

This is the perfect time to ask: What do I really want in this next phase of life? Whether it’s travelling, learning a new skill, deepening relationships, starting a new career or business, or pursuing creative endeavours, the possibilities are endless.

As we positively shape our future we may focus on:

1. Prioritising Self-Care – Taking care of physical, emotional, and mental well-being for increased vitality and longevity.

2. Strengthening Relationships – Cultivating deep, meaningful connections with loved ones for increased joy and fulfillment.

3. Embracing New Experiences – Trying new things with enthusiasm - whether hobbies, travel, or career shifts, to keep life exciting and purposeful.

4. Giving Back – Mentoring, volunteering, or contributing to the community as a way to help others and share our life experiences.

5. Living Authentically – Letting go of societal expectations and embracing personal values for true happiness.

Becoming Our Best Selves

Ultimately, to make our next chapter the best it can be we need to be kind to ourselves and have the courage to follow our heart. We need to embrace our authenticity, resilience, and strength, with confidence.

It's not always easy, but we can make 50 the start of a transformational second chapter full of new opportunities - if we choose to step into it with an open heart, a curious mind, and an adventurous spirit. ❤️

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